Cesarina Garcia

Picked Before Bloom Cesarina Garcia

When you experience sexual molestation and abuse as a child - there is no palatable way to say that.




I ceased to exist presently in the moments that were my life. I was broken and longing for reconciliation with whom I believed I once was - the naivete of a child insisting that life must yield a greater meaning than my small, unforgiving instance of an existence.




The circumstances for my experiences are not written here because those are specific to me. What is expressed here, is how those experiences made me feel. As I shared my story with some close family and friends, I realized that sexual abuse is not an isolated incident - it happens to so many others.




This book is my offering to the world. It is my truth and the truth of many. It is for anyone who has experienced trauma. It is poetry. It is ugly. It is uncomfortable. It is growth. It speaks in tongues.




I was picked before bloom, but still:




i am free to love without hesitation

to love without pause

despite my previous inclination

to doubt just because.



i am freed from my limitation

because i harbor no remorse nor regret.

my life has been lived by

versions of me who had not known me yet.



i am happy to bloom

from untethered roots -

from the concrete where i

had been left.



without any real structure,

i am happy to say -

i forged my own path with no regrets.