Linda Regula

A Heart Wants What It Wants Linda Regula

Noble Rule, an eighteen-year old struggling to keep his homosexuality secret, and Annalise Morgan, the reclusive artist who began mentoring him at age three, have formed an enduring bond. Believing his life is in danger if homophobic mountain folk discover his secret, Noble reveals his gayness to Annalise. Shamed to tell his parents, he accepts a prestigious art scholarship in Ohio. Despite the tolerant atmosphere on campus, he feels alienated from his peers and remains fearful of revealing his sexual preferences. His father's unrealistic expectation that his son will eventually pass through his "sissy artistic phase" and accept a traditional role within the family adds to Noble's shame about coming out. Returning home on break, he is determined to reveal his homosexuality. His older brother, a marine serving in Iraq, is killed and knowing to do so would only add to his parents' sorrow, after the funeral Noble returns to campus, his secret intact. Burdened by the loss of his brother, his demanding course overload, dread of being branded a fagot, and his confusing relationship with fellow student, Daniel Mathis, Nobel seeks the friendship of Clella Sargenta, a brilliant Rhodes scholar. Clella, misunderstanding his motives and ignorant of his clandestine relationship with Daniel, declares her love. Although Annalise remains attentive to Nobel's activities through descriptive letters and his infrequent visits home, she grows increasingly concerned about his physical and mental wellbeing. Without his companionship, she easily falls back into her solitary habits. As repressed memories of childhood trauma and her husband's horrifying death resurface, she spends exhausting hours at her easel creating powerful works of art. Nobel's mercurial relationship with Daniel keeps him in a constant state of emotional upheaval and during an art opening; an intoxicated Daniel belligerently confronts Annalise about the mysterious circumstances of her husband's death.