Ian Gouge

A Pattern of Sorts Ian Gouge

We often encounter difficulty when trying to reconcile our memories of events with what actually happened. In the almost inevitable mis-match, our mind plays tricks on us, and what we have recently learned and how we have recently lived gets in the way and colours the past.




Pressed to recall his own life, the challenge of juggling myth and reality is dangerously fraught for Luke - especially given the story of his remarkable emotional high, and the catastrophe which followed it.




"If there was one thing I knew about Luke it was that he liked certainty and closure; he hated loose ends and from what I could see they upset him. But looking back now, is that really true? I mean, did I really think that at the time or is it just me seeing into the heart of it, now that it's all too late?"




"Is that just me saying it now, remembering it the way in which I have chosen to remember it, providing a gloss, an overlay, in order to give the impression that throughout it all I was calm and in control?"